I have been working all wel . These past two weeks . And let me tell ya it has been the greatest two weeks like no joke . My first week was a little off just because it didn’t start exactly how I wanted it to but it ended up being really fun ! And then i got to travel to Cali with my aunt to chino and go shopping and work ! Lol I really am also happy at the fact that I get to help her ( my aunt ) with her house warming party . It is making both of us extremely tires but we are frying there . Ahhhh for dinner I really wanted sushi ! Sometimes I just wish little kids liked it ! If they start eating it before they actually knew what it was they would eat it more often and they actually might like or enjoy it ! Well I’m gonna have it for lunch soo who cares :)
So it actually did . like i thought me and him worked things out but honestly they didn’t even change . we really got nowhere fast how sad is that I really wanted to go back to when we hung out for no reason or we just drove around and did absolutely nothing . and when the vibe was ” wow I am so happy we are just togetherr” not “I wonder if he even wants me around” like we don’t even talk how we used to and i really don’t know how to fix this and maybe I shouldn’t try anymore . maybe I should stop caring just like he has stopped caring . he has stopped caring about our relationship so maybe since we technically aren’t together I should stop caring to . It truly sucks that I even have to think about being this way but if that is what it takes for him to realize that if he doesn’t try to fix this that he really will loose the best damn thing that will/has ever happened to him ever . I know that I definately don’t want to loose him but I want him to know how close he is to the edge and how close he is to fucking up everything . However the good moments that we have had are the greatest but they are starting to fade out since they don’t happen that often anymore . I really miss the dougie I met but I guess it is true that everyone does change fir the better or worse . ;/
Wow so you complain that we fight too much but you are always the one who picks a fight with me . You say that you don’t care about stuff but you really do you just never say it . And what I think is so odd is that you wanna “fix things” but whenever I try to talk to you , you never take it seriously . So honestly tell me when your truly ready to work things out because if your going to sit here and complain about every little thing then you might as well just say the words and end it . I really want things to be how they were but it’s a two way street and I know that I’m putting as much effort in this relationship as I possibly can . But if you are truly putting in an effort then I will just have to except the fact that even tho you don’t show that you want it to work out as much as I want you to show, doesn’t mean your not trying with all your heart . However it does suck to feel that you want me to fix our relationship on my own . It’s like the weight of the world is on my shoulders and one bad step and it’s all gone . All the progress . All the hard work . And all the pointless effort to a relationship that wasn’t going anywhere in the first place . Gawd I hope he can prove me wrong . I hate feelings these way .